I just want to be able to work!

Hello everyone! I have officially gotten over the side effects of my first chemo treatment. I feel good, almost back to normal. One minor problem. My neutrophil count is low and instead of rising, it just keeps falling to the point that my immune system is about shot. The count is too low to work at my job, caring for the sick. I'm stuck in the house and that's getting old. I love my kids but man, are they getting on my nerves. I contacted my boss to see if there is somewhere else I can be placed until I'm healthy enough to take on the role again. I hope so because I would like some sense of normalcy back. Today is day 13 since I started my treatment. My hair is beginning to thin, strand by strand. I've been mentally preparing myself for this for weeks but it's still a blow to my self esteem. Everyone's been great, offering beautiful words of encouragement. I swear, what would I do without you all? I'd be in a dark cloud of dispair but you all won't let me. You were all placed in my life for a reason and now, it's all becoming clear why! Thank you as always, from the bottom of my heart.

Itchy, itchy, itchy!

Mentally and physically... today is so much better. The aches are tolerable and I actually feel like doing something for a change. This is great because I was starting to feel like a slug and feeling pretty guilty that Jon has to take care of me all the time. My big downfall for the day.... itchy rash all over my chest, neck and face. I look ridiculous! I called the doctor and they told me to Benadryl it up. So I may be out of commission anyway. As for the mouth ulcers, the doctors are currently calling in a prescription for Magic Swizzle to numb me up. I heard, it's the bomb! Thanks Beth for being an only child *wink, wink*. Hopefully my taste buds will come back soon. Everything tastes funny and I feel like I have pruney mouth all the time. Such a weird feeling. Ice pops and supplemental drinks have been my friends lately. Sorry that I took a hiatus on the thank you cards... I've been pretty down lately. But I think today will be the day to express my gratitude once again. I truly am so appreciative of all the love and support my family and I have been receiving. It's so nice to have such great people on our side and helping us push through this. I love you all!

I was hoping today would be better!

Today is day 3 post chemo! I was hoping to escape the side effects but I think they have a really big hold on me. The body aches is what is really getting me! I ache from my head, to my neck and shoulders, down to my toes. It's almost as if the flu bug has bit me and bit me hard. I am beginning to get little red bumps on my tongue which are making my mouth hurt too. Guess I should lay off my fresh, lemon water a bit. That could create a problem. Emotionally.... today has not been a great day. I woke up from my nap and I saw my kids for the first time, in what feels like 10 years. I feel like I haven't been able to spend a single minute with them and I feel like a bad mom. Everyone keeps telling me that "it's okay, they know you love them and that you're sick." That doesn't make it any easier, unfortunately. Lots of negative thoughts keep flowing back to my brain and I'm trying really hard, but sometimes, I just don't know. Jon has been keeping it together, and I'm not sure how? What did I ever do to deserve such a great, supportive, handsome, loving, husband and father? Sometimes I wonder! But he loves me and I'm so grateful for him, everyday. I'll try to update in a few days... if I'm feeling up to it. Thank you again for all the love and support!

Tomorrow is the BIG day!

Tomorrow is the BIG day! I'm sitting home alone. My kids are in good hands at Cliff and Kristy's house and Jon is at work while I sit here lost in my own thoughts. I'm thinking "this is it." No turning back now! I need to be at the Cancer Center at 7:45 tomorrow morning to begin my chemo treatment. This is what I've been waiting for since my plan has been implemented 2 weeks ago. I'm nervous, anxious, and have a million things going through my head. I'm trying to remain positive that the side effects won't get me too bad. I don't want to be stuck in bed, with body aches and hair falling out on my pillow. I want to be playing outside with my children, loving my husband and enjoying my life. I know I can't look into the future and foresee what's going to happen, but I do pray for an easy course. I do want to thank everyone again for their love and support during my difficult time. I don't know where I'd be without you all. Please keep the prayers and positive vibes coming. I know there working! Love, Krista

And the diagnosis is.....

I was living the life. I have a wonderful husband and two beautiful babies. I'm a year into nursing school, 1 more to go to reach my goal. When I found it! A suspicious lump on my left breast. After many, and I mean many invasive and non-invasive tests, the diagnosis was in. Invasive ductal carcinoma, is what they said. Breast cancer? Me? No way! How could this be? I have no family history, I'm only 34 years old, for god sakes. But it's the harsh reality I'm facing right now. I met with my surgeon, Dr. McGuire. She's so compassionate and understanding and sat with me for a long while, explaining what my options are. Do we do surgery first? Chemo? Radiation? Yikes... so much to take in. Next was the meeting with my Oncologist, Dr. Ristogi, another beautiful soul. She explained that my best treatment option would be to start with chemo first x's 6 months to decrease the size of the lump, then remove the tumor via a lumpectomy with Dr. McGuire, and potentially radiation afterwards. So there it is, my plan in a nutshell I have days of extreme anxiousness, worrying about my future, my poor husband who has been my rock, and my childrens welfare. I worry about the financial aspect of all the co-pays, deductables and dr. bills. Through this past month, I have been humbled by such supportive friends, relatives, and co-workers. I have received food donations, grocery store gift cards, a fundraising benefit in July to help with my financial costs. Many of you, outside and inside of the Pittsburgh area have asked how they can contribute, so my husband put together this page. I hate asking for things as I've always been such a strong, independent women. But the truth of the matter, is that I need help. My family needs help making ends meet, as I fight this cancer that has invaded my body. With all the love and support I've been receiving, I have no doubt that Cancer messed with the wrong chick. Keep the prayers coming and I thank you, from the bottom of my heart for your help.

We would like to thank everyone for your support in advance!